Enabis blogg

I don't have much of compassion to anything in this mortal life, I care of only a few things and respect even less. The reason I play games is more then just the passion and love for it, the whole idea and ideal life of people being united and joined together as one. That no matter what they will stand united against whatever is thrown at them and that they shall never falter for corruption amongst themselfs and never to forget who they are and remember their old ones.

I miss something i've never really experienced... strange isn't it? Unity and compassion amongst eachother, a shared hatred and joy. The world we live in today live under false ideas and promises of unity and people being equal to one another, it's all straight out bullshit.


"People being equal and all have the same rights" Hah, how puny and what a false ideal way of life. The only time we will ever become this is if we're all cloned with the same looks,way of talking,views,opinions and if everyone thinks exactly the same fucking thing. To pursue this ideal is stupid and probaly the most horrible thing on this earth.

Have you ever thought of the meaning of this whole life and your existance? Alot of people do and alot of people don't. I have, alot in fact, I ask myself if the things everyone else tell me is the meaning of is... school, education, work and a family. Truth is, the meaning of our lifes and existance is simply whatever we decide it to be.

Me? Well personally I don't have that certain something to fight for... I wish I had though, I have alot of ideas and thought's of what I could do with loyalty of a few and mine to them. There is but one person who have given me any kind of meaning in this life. What i'm saying is that she herself is the meaning of my life, to be with her trough good and bad and be as one, for when I look in the the future of my life all I can see is her pretty smile and warm touch.

Now that I think about it... all of this, maybe that's the meaning of my life? To create a future of my own which I myself will shape with whom I love.

I really don't know what i'm going to do with my life, before she came along I was just dragging my flesh around.. taking one day at a time and simply thinking about everything... alot. When I met her my life got a new sort off meaning, but she is not something that was a nice change of paste or anything, she's not an objective for me to have and feel good about, She is the individual that I love and is more then words can describe. I've never "loved" anything before or anyone, i've either had strong feelings for a certain person or respect or simply a certain "love" torwards a material thing.. like my computer for example or when I got my first mobile phone or certain games that have touched me on an emotional level beyond describing.

Anyhow, my definition of love is.. odd I suppose. I'd like to think that it's the ideal one and well, who know's, maybe it is? It's so hard to explain it in words but it was made from something that moved me alot and changed my life, to know that you will be with this person trough joy and hell itself if so be and you will just know that no matter what happends, you will be one. It will be us two as one person and everyone else are the once we let in, but we are united in a way... if I have a soul, it belongs to her.