AnnieChans blogg

I hate this. I hate my life. Everything just goes wrong. All I ever wanted was to be happy.. But no, I guess that's too much to ask for.
And now I can't even harm myself because my stupid mother will be mad if I do and put me up to penalty-things.
Fuck this shit.
I just want to cry. But I can't. Because people will just question me about it. They will ask why. But the fact is.. I don't know why. I just know that it hurts. It hurts in my heart, it hurts in my soul and my life has been turned up-side-down lately. If I could just be happy for a while.. I guess not. I guess it's too much to ask for..

Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to sit in a corner, alone, and cry quietly, hoping that no one will find me.

SHIT. I could have played it cool. But NO. I HAD to fuck things up.. What if this makes it akward? What if I'll never get what I want? What do I even want? I am so confused...

I hate this. I might die before I'm even an adult. Before I even graduate.. That's not how it's supposed to be. It's not, it's really not. Fuck this. Why me? Why does it always have to be me all the fucking time? Why not the bastard who fucked up my life? Or the bastard that raped me repeatedly? What in the name of god did I do to deserve this more than them? I just don't understand..

I hate it when people pretend to care.
Everyone I meet is like "Hey, how are you?", but they really don't care about the answer.
WHY WOULD YOU ASK IF YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW? I don't understand..

I always give honest answers if you ask for my opinion on something. But most people that ask me dosen't want to hear the truth. BUT I'M SORRY, I'M JUST NOT GOING TO LIE TO YOU. If you want someone to do that, FIND SOMEONE ELSE.

Moral of this: If you don't want the answer, DON'T ASK.

Sincerely, Angry blogger

Here I am. Home. Alone. And very tired. Maybe I should go to sleep, maybe I should stay awake. Who knows.. At least I don't.

But anyway..

I wanted to write you a song.
With some words that you'll enjoy,
A melodi that goes along.
So baby would you be my boy?

Be mine.
I'm sure everything'll be just fine.
So be mine.
You are surely my sunshine.


Careful what you wish for tonight.
Cause I won't wait here forever.
Maybe the stars will shine to bright.
We might never get together..

Be mine.
I'm sure everything'll be just fine.
So be mine.
You are surely my sunshine.

You might not remember my words.
Maybe you only like nerds.
But I will try this anyway.
It's just something I have to say!

Will you be mine?
I beg you I will never whine.
Be mine.
You are always my sunshine.

Be mine.
I'm sure everything'll be just fine.
So be mine.
You are surely my sunshine.

So yea, I didn't finish the last text, but I don't mind.

Here is a little poem I wrote:

This is a poem about life.
But I don't think anyone'll read it.
So I guess it isn't worth a shit.
Some say it's all about getting a job.
a house, a dog and a wife.

I say life is about living,
Experience, wisdom and caring.
About the people that you hold dear.
But doubt not, that it won't always be easy.
Even if you try hard to make things work,
You will some day meet fear.


nooooooooooooooooooooooooo. that did just not turn out the way I planned it to.




Let's try again.

I am wandering around without clothes.
People might get chocked, mostly since it snows.
I am bleeding from everywhere, even from my nose.
People will not care, they must think I am grose.
Maybe I am, maybe they are right.
"Will you help me, mam? It's in the middle of the night"
But of course she won't. She will deny me shelter.
I continue my wander, the morning is soon to come.
But by then, my body will be pale and cold, and I will be numb.



Yup. That's all for tonight.. I miss someone tonight.
I relly would have wanted to call that person. Things might have gone different.
But they didn't. And so, here I am. Crying, bleeding and wanting to sleep..
But blame you I will not. For none of this is your fault. I am just in desperet need of help right now..

I wish to see you soon.

Hejsan!
Det är jag som är Annie.
Antingen känner ni mig, eller så gör ni inte det.
Eller så tror ni att ni gör det.
Det sista alternativet är vanligast nuförtiden faktiskt.
Kan nog bara säga att det finns ett fåtal personer som känner mig på djupet.
Det är ju lite synd. Men nåväl, vill du lära känna mig så är det fritt fram att ta kontakt. ^^

Jag är ingen komplicerad människa, eller deprimerad. Inte alls faktiskt. Men alla nänniskor har sina upp och nergångar i livet, annars hade vi ju aldrig lärt oss något. Eller hur?

Hm, om man inte känner mig så kan man beskriva mig som en trevlig och väldigt flummig person. Jag älskar att träna. Jag springer varannan dag och tränar boxning regelbundet 4 dagar i veckan. Jag är överviktig, det är jag fullt medveten om, och därför jobbar jag på att förändra det. Hittills har jag gått ner totalt sett 16 kilo, men mer ska det bli. Däremot är jag absolut inte anorektiker eller bulimiker bara för att jag går ner i vikt för jag äter som en jävla häst och äter väldigt hälsosamt.

Jag pluggar Humanistprogrammet på Katedralskolan i Lund. Till hösten börjar jag tvåan. Det är en väldigt bra skola. Den har fått något av ett snobbrykte på sig vilket jag tycker är fel.

Anyway, skriver klart detta inlägget senare, CIAO!

Hejhej, vad kul det här verkar...not.
Någon kommer ju klart läsa detta...not.

Men i alla fall...det är kväll..NO SHIT! O_O

ÅÅÅÅhhh.....störigt! T_T

Jaja..jag ska snart sova..förvånar mig att jag faktiskt har tid att sitta här och skirva...ô^ô

Jag har, som ni kanske förstått, ganska tajt schema..

Men vill ni mig något, så äre bara o skriva...det är alltid kul..:D

Fast ne...nu ska jag smsa min kompis och sen sova..............eller inte....fast jo...


Aaaah! Jag orkar inte nånting!!!!

Gonatt..^^