1408. tw äs prat/förlåtelse på nåt sätt

dear body,
I haven?t treated you like I should. I have destroyed you for years. I have starved you for years and leaving marks that always will be there to remind me of what I have done. People say that you should love your body because you only get one but I can?t love something that have made me ashamed of who I am. I know my body deserves better. I know my body deserves love. I know I can?t give my body that. I haven?t in 12 years. I started to hate who I was at the age of 10. I always kept to myself because none would understand how the 10 year old wanted to loose weight and hated every inch of myself. I have battled with anorexia for as long as I remember. I don?t remember the last time I ate like a normal person. I don?t remember how it was to just buy something without checking the calories. I don?t remember how it was before I got anxious around food. I dont remember how my body looks without scars, its been so long. I made the first cut when i was 12. Im 23 now. I don?t remember anything. All I remember was that my body was disgusting. I don?t deserve you body, I?m sorry for the pain, sorry for the abuse I?m putting you through. I?m sorry that I can?t treat you well.